When your family doesn’t support your dreams, what do you do? Do you feel down or disappointed? Maybe you feel upset or discouraged.
Family should be the people we’re closest to in this life. After all, we grew up in the same household with our siblings and parents, so they should love and care for us… because that’s what families do, right?
Not all the time.
Many of us come from broken and dysfunctional families, so it’s not surprising that we don’t share creative or big endeavors with them. If we can’t share the small stuff with them, how can we share the big stuff?
However, there are some of us who did grow up in loving and supportive families. That doesn’t mean that parents and siblings are perfect.
You’re probably reading this article because you shared a dream, project, creative endeavor, or exciting news with your family and they responded negatively. Whether they questioned what you’re doing, brushed off your news, or outright said that they don’t support your dreams, it can be discouraging.
You had probably expected your family to support and get excited with you… or at least show some form of interest. They’re family, after all… right?
Unfortunately, not all families are the same, and they don’t always support you. So what do you do when family doesn’t support your dreams?
In this article we’ll discuss how not to get discouraged when your family doesn’t support you. So let’s dive in. 🙂
Set realistic expectations
You know your family better than anyone else. You grew up with them, observed your parents, got to know your siblings.
Because you know them best, you can set realistic expectations. Evaluate past experiences and interactions with your family… Have they congratulated you before? What are their reactions when you’ve shared dreams with them before?
Take a moment to think about past experiences. What were you hoping to expect from your family this time? Based off of past experiences, were your expectations realistic?
Every family is different, and the personalities and characteristics of each member changes the dynamic. Try to set realistic expectations so that you won’t feel so disappointed. Acceptance makes it easier on your mental health.
Accept that people have different personalities
Everybody in your family is different.
Though you may have had a great childhood, a sibling might not feel the same way. Even a relationship with a parent differs from child to child. Everyone has different personalities, problems, and insecurities. Try to see your family members in that light.
Know that they are each struggling through their own problems and trials, and their personalities affect that.
Another tip here is that some families really don’t have the personality you might have hoped for. You might see a family that cheers and screams and jumps when someone shares big news. Whereas your own family stares, doesn’t say anything, or changes the subject. Everyone expresses themselves differently, including people in your family.
Try not to take things personally and understand that every person is different.
Accept that your family isn’t perfect
Your family might not give you the reaction you want. They might stare at you, say something negative, or outright ignore you.
So it’s important to take care of yourself. Especially when it comes to sharing the workings of your heart, something you truly desire… you have to recognize these two things:
1. If you share this dream, this deep desire, with others, they will always have an opinion. It might be good or bad, but are you willing to hear that opinion? Or would you rather keep it to yourself and share with someone you truly trust? Just because family is family, doesn’t mean they need to know everything about you. And it also doesn’t mean that you trust family.
2. Prepare yourself to not care what people think or defend yourself. Or ask yourself, is it even worth it? Is it it worth it to hear people’s criticism of your dreams, or have to stand up for yourself?
When it gets down to it, the choice is yours. It’s ok to accept that your family isn’t perfect, and they might not give you the reaction you want or expect. But please take care of yourself. If you know it’ll disappoint, discourage, or even cause you mental health issues, then maybe it’s best not to share with your family.
There are other people who are happy and ready to support you in your dreams.
Communicate if it really bothers you
If you’re close to your family and feel like they’re really not giving you the credit and kindness that you deserve, communicate that.
Families who communicate openly and with kindness and compassion can draw closer together. Maybe you’ll find out things about family members that you didn’t know. Perhaps someone is struggling with something, so they couldn’t get it in themselves to celebrate with you.
Or maybe your family members have personalities where they can’t look past their own insecurities. Another possibility is that people are selfish and self-absorbed at times. If something is really bothering you, and you want to voice your opinion, by all means do it.
And if people choose not to care about supporting you and your dreams, then you can at least have the confidence in knowing that you tried. You gave them an opportunity to learn more about you, but they turned it down.
While it might feel disappointing, please don’t linger on it too long. You have so much ahead of you.
In conclusion
Family is hard sometimes… well, a lot of times. Every person is going through something, but when family members put themselves over their own siblings, parents, or children, it makes it hard for everyone.
But please don’t get discouraged when your family doesn’t support your dreams. You’re doing a great job, and anything is possible. Even if your family doesn’t support your dreams, try to look at the bigger picture.
You’re a child of God, meaning you’re a part of God’s family. God is your loving Heavenly Father, and because He is your father, and you are his child, is anything impossible? No. You got this friend!
What are your thoughts?
Do you struggle when your family doesn’t support you? How do you overcome this trial and get through? Let us know in the comments. We’d love to hear from you! Mahalo!
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